Wedding Q&A Thursday – Honeymoon Registries

Q: I have heard about "honeymoon registries" from a few friends. What exactly are they and do they fall in line with proper etiquette?

B: Couples used to move in with each other after the wedding and straight from their parents' houses, so asking for kitchen and bath items was a necessity - people were literally helping them get started on their own. Nowadays more and more couples are getting married older, and often have already lived together or on their own and have a house full of items. This may make a "traditional" registry - dishes, linens, china, crystal, kitchen appliancess.. - a bit useless, unless such as couple is looking to upgrade home goods and such.

A honeymoon registry is a web site where you ask your guests to donate upgrades, activities or money towards the cost of your honeymoon in lieu of a concrete gift. Guests can buy you a night out on the town or breakfast in bed; they can pay for you to go zip-lining through the jungle or swim with the dolphins. The options are endless and many of the sites will suggest things for you to do based on where you are going - research you would be doing anyway.

So are they within the confines of proper etiquette? Well if you honestly don’t have a need for items, and don’t want to do a traditional registry (even though we suggest that you still register for some traditional items) a honeymoon registry is a great alternative. The thing is, if people want to give you a concrete token of their affection, they'll do just that, no matter how much you ask otherwise. But a lot of people will just give you money anyway, which you may be planning on using for the honeymoon - if you register, at least they can choose what they're helping to pay for.

But you don't have to take our meager word, Etiquette Queen Bee Emily Post has chimed in on the subject:

"Is a Honeymoon Registry appropriate? Yes, but don’t expect all guests to choose that gift option. Some will be more comfortable selecting a traditional gift, or giving cash. A honeymoon registry is an acceptable choice, but it’s probably safest to give guests alternate choices -- so it’s a good idea to still register for some traditional items, too."

So how do they work, exactly? Well, here is a site that is far better than us at explaining all the details on honeymoon registries! They have also done the work for you in comparing eight different honeymoon registries so you can see what is the best option for you!

We know you are out there, our google analytics tell us so, so be sure to comment and tell us if you used a honeymoon registry or what your feelings are about them. Your comments help other brides formulate their decisions!

Do you have any questions for us? We feature a new question each Thursday, send yours in to info@triciahuddas.com and we might feature your question next!